But the feeling of being trapped felt more like something inside of you wanted to come out?
Something was simmering. Forming. Undulating. Ready to display the most most beautiful and terrifying explosion you have ever seen.
That is how I am feeling.
I don't feel trapped. I don't feel tied down, as though this is my life and that is all it will be. But trapped as though there is another 'she' inside of me wanting to announce
"I AM FREE I AM FREE BY GLORY I AM FREE".
But this explosion has not occured. And it has been sitting heavy in the pit of my chest for days now . I wonder, is it gas? But alas, remedies have not worked. And the intimate feeling of sheer anxiety, anticipation and excitement sits patiently in my chest (while I do not).
What is this overwhelming feeling that lingers during the day?
What is this feeling that bubbles inside of me wanting to cause my legs to run, jump and leap - to be free like a wild horse, naked and joyous.
What is this feeling that curses through my fingers like I am Edward Scissor hands ready to create a masterpiece of leaves, twine and the natural ability to craft.
What is this feeling that rumbles in my diaphragm convincing me that if I just open my mouth and sing I will be on the stage with all lights, sweat and a diamond smile and a voice that could cause you to hold your breath.
What is this feeling?
I wonder if, there comes a time when our personal calling is so deeply buried in our soul as to be invisible. But it’s still there. Free People Book Club
I read a blog post about a book called The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho.
Is this heaviness I feel, my personal calling.
One’s Personal Legend is what you have always wanted to accomplish. Everyone, when they are young, knows what their Personal Legend is. At that point in their lives, everything is clear and everything is possible. They are not afraid to dream, and to yearn for everything they would like to see happen to them in their lives. But, as time passes, a mysterious force begins to convince them that it will be impossible for them to realize their Personal Legend… whoever you are, or whatever it is that you do, when you really want something, it’s because that desire originated in the soul of the universe. It’s your mission on earth. Free People Book Club